What is engaging with the decline of dad is there is a fascinating group of people, all with a different set of skills, degrees, and functions. If you step back and look at hospice versus the hospital. It really is a beautiful thing as a choice - versus sticking someone in a nursing home or hospital. After talking to my friend, whose dad is getting robbed in a nursing home, we will do whatever we can to keep him here.
Of course, I wonder how many people really are ok to care for their spouse or loved one in today's market. The caregiving is more of a full-time job, of which, it isn't difficult from a technical standpoint, but it is more draining with the real ease of losing oneself into another.
What I am witnessing is a common problem with society today. Be it in relationships, emotional health, and overall fitness. People have forgotten to take care of themselves inside the united states with spiritual/religious, physical, and mental health. I blame a part of it on the model of society where a few super-wealthy are put upon a pedestal, and the media and social model bombards people with so many repetitive messages and impressions that it gives little time for people to stop and ask "why?
"programming" is a word that comes to mind. You had radio programming, television programming, and computer programing. I don't think I ever heard of "book and reading" programming in my life. I think it is because, with reading, your mind can vicariously create your world that you are reading about. You program it yourself versus watching or listening to something that someone else scripted.
So with the hospice, it is a bit like watching a company at work. Everyone has their piece, and the reality is from top to bottom; it is a bit of guesswork with the overall process. People don't want to either look at the whole? Or they are scared to? Or perhaps it is merely fear and insecurity to go out from what one knows as their world or bubble. This is the part that probably has scientists, preachers, doctors, and psychiatrists all agreeing there is a problem -yet, how the approach to it is not holistic anymore in the west – preferably something is done as a procedure or stop-gap to treat the symptoms rather than the disease.
What is beautiful to watch with the hospice is the intersection, and the ability to see all the parts with life, coming together in the process of death. Perhaps you get this in a birthing room, but I would like to think for the most part there is great joy in the birthing process. With death, if you don't believe in anything beyond this life – I wonder how cold and painful the process can be? If one is stuck in the checklist of religion and rule book checking – it probably can be just as terrifying?
I honestly don't know – but am enjoying the group of nurses, social workers, doctors, and aides that come help my dad. Each has a slightly different perspective, the construct of each, and their activity doesn't really encompass all. I ask questions, listen to how each person is and what they do, and add my mother. She brings the icing of the cake in about the reality of grief via letting go and emotions. It is astounding how one can lock into and hold onto some feeling of control and actually hinder the health of the sick person.
You see this a lot in organizations where the leaders change something to put their mark upon their legacy over the organization. Most of the organization is doing a lot of work that makes no sense because all the part of the overall pizza can't see each other. That is a conversation for systems or organizational development specialists.
What I know and see is that I will go back and study the fMRI data of a female and male brain and how they process data. Emotions vs. logic. It is very different. As I typed this, I have a question about if a lesbian, gay, or transgender brain processes? See how my mind works? Right now, I am trying to break down emotional fears in someone with death and dying and not inhibit the pain and suffering and allow that be a hindrance to the actual patient.
In essence, that is what all this brainstorm is about. I have an idea, and I have tested all the parts out. I have to model and prototype it and get it ready for prime time.
There is a giant need. So go build it. It is a choice for people to try to change, or they sit locked into their boxes of self-creation that what they see is all there is to life and living
It's a choice. Do you enjoy the entire pizza? Or just want only one topping? Neither option is all right, nor all incorrect…however, you do have to refocus perspective between the two to see the truth continually.