Last night before going to sleep, I was reading an article about sin and the effects on the person and how it is easy to rationalize and make a habit of sin. What is a sin? the definition I learned that makes sense beyond all the legalism of religion is, “anything that keeps one out of communion with pure love (that's what I have come to the conclusion God is…pure love)
Ever been in church and it seems like you are just going through the emotions, or you wonder, “where are you god?” when you get into non-transient communities in the world, it is straightforward to allow the obligations of habit to seemingly overwhelm and block out the spiritual element of actual love from God.
Today I woke up late to go to service that is a denomination I was born into, and since lent has been so hard, I remembered a spirit-filled church by the gym. I could make the 10 am start and did. My experience with the Spirit-filled churches is from the Nashville area and the deep south where most of the people I came across were burnt out on the Catholic or the ultra-conservative Baptist or church of Christ denominations. I had yet to meet the old man in the middle of the dessert yet a big issue one has globally with the eastern church is that is isn’t all the big in the west for the various reasons of religious turf grabbing over a few thousand years.
I also have a lot of heartburn of each denomination calling itself the real, only way to salvation. It is like the Jewish religion at the time of Jesus walking the world. I think there were six significant sects of Judaism all loading up the people with rules and regulations that seem more like a burden than something to learn the love of God and communion with him.
Maybe it is the pride of man that keeps us from letting go that something quite a bit greater than us could create the cosmos, universe, billions of galaxies and trillions of stars, god only knows what is going on outside the three dimensions we puny humans reside in?
Inside these three dimensions, humans can love. We can also act no different than animals in the wild. Wait, I take that back – animals in the wild merely make what they need. a man has learned to try to take everything and then look back and wonder, “why is the planet screwed up?”
I digress. I am grateful for this service today. It was a few songs I had never heard were not filled with religious rhetoric and repetitions, just straight forward, seemingly simple messages that resonated in my heart and soul. The preacher, I have to say, he took the message I was reading about with sin – and brought it home with the reality of Jesus’s last week on this planet in a human form.
Guess it is time to see the monks again and figure out how to get back where I want, in a world that will do everything to keep one back in a place where love is behind fear with how people think. life in the united states at least seems to be led more with fear, insecurity and being controlled by legalism.
Who knows, maybe I will end up in the woods as a monk someday. I had to laugh that when I looked at the rules for becoming one of them, I just threw up my hands, “I am so bad that even the monks won’t take me.”
Perhaps I am overthinking? Or maybe I have done enough in life and seen enough to realize that the world will never fill one's heart and soul. Success as we are taught, is like a meal where “how much is enough? we are never full.”
Sorry about the ramble, I got a smattering of grace today that was missing in the other denomination. Perhaps there are too many rules and regulation they are holding on with closed fists? I am a massive work in progress in what feels like a world that thinks they are perfect, or are told to be.
I invented a character years ago, “mr tan” he was a photojournalist that would go around the planet and times in history and create interesting, but completely photoshopped fakes of world leaders suffering from megalomania interacting with various historical event in time. his key words were, “no photoshop fakey fake…real picture!”
I had no idea that a character in 1996 was actually prophetic with what was coming to mainstream society.