It is an interesting dichotomy with life in that I am still not sure if it is possible to keep working on one’s heart, soul, inner fitness and actually living in the ordinary reality of the world en masse?
The process is a bit like going to a gym, you can work and strive to improve, but if you go eat that big buffet of yum, all the work you did can go away very quickly. If you allow a bad habit to continue, suddenly it is easy to look back one day and go, “how did I get here?” usually things are not significant or earthshattering, rather the accumulation of something building up over time.
I say the same thing with the idea of Eureka moments. If you work 365 days a year with a brainstorm, you might have 2-4 moments where perspective or perception shifts and something unusual appears in your vision.
Some people think this is some incredible insight or vision that has been given to them – and I have to confess there are a few ideas, like the core of agrowspace and feeding hungry people that came out of nowhere and from a direction I really had no experience with. Most of these rare moments are the result of a lot of work, merely continuing to go the extra 85 steps beyond what most people will give with their 15, and not limiting the idea to reasons why something will not work. instead, you are asking, “how can I get this to work” or “wouldn’t it be really cool if we could…”
This same walk has been a struggle from the spiritual or inner fitness sense with me, as while I worked on the technology side of brain and mood manipulation, the heart and should appear to be working in a very different area of one's anatomy. Human logic and the psychology of the mind are just that. A person thinks they can figure out life all by themselves. In some respects, it gives more of a limited view of love and life.
If you realize you are a speck of dust in the cosmos, yet, there is something far more significant that we can’t see or witness in our human form, then you will learn there is something (I call it god, pure love) that is available to help us go beyond our human limits and grow. This is a part where I have learned a great deal from the monks and have to listen to all the people in the world say, “yeah, it is so easy to just go out and live all by yourself in a desert!” I don’t know how many people really have taken the time to sit with themselves, and allow all the crud of their human imperfection to come face to face with yourself? All makeup, image and stuff drops and you are merely there looking at yourself.
Truth is this was the moment when I realized I wasn't’ so smart at all, and a lot of the world chasing was pretty foolish and a choice I made. I am not going to lie, life on earth can really be a lot of fun, but it will never fill your heart and soul if you want to get honest with yourself.
that last line, is a hard pill to swallow at the level of really getting honest with yourself as it will get you to a place where something else lifts you up and asks, “ok, you tried it your way, do you want to follow my way now?”
When you realize pure love, simply loves….no strings or conditions attached. Then I think you can take a step and try to help others, and understand and see how much of their stuff, you have significant experience in living yourself. And then you learn the beauty of life and love. It is a choice. You don’t have to change anyone, only yourself, and you give your love freely to help others and if they don’t want it. It is fine.
Something far more significant is in charge. I guess that is what I am learning, even in the confines of a Christian church. It is a bit like going to a doctor each week for a checkup. The monks and the monastery is where you go for the trauma center for the soul. they are the only folks I know that say, “to heal another, you first have to heal yourself.”
And they do and have completed that step. Of which, you can see where each person has made space for something else inside themselves. Despite the incredible variety and beauty in the world, you realize it really doesn’t mean all that much in the grand scheme of life. Love does. How you choose to drop your fears and learn to overcome them in others and yourself – is a journey indeed.
That is my 10-minute ramble about??? This Sunday. Grace and peace of heart are really the most precious things I know of when you realize there is unconditional love available to all.
the hard part is you have to let go of yourself to even see and experience that it exists beyond reading about it in holy books. that is my two free cents from paying a very high price to learn that reality. but it was worth every penny. you realize you are not alone…ever. that is about the only priceless advise i can give anyone, seek god.