the moment of insanity - healing

einstein said insanity was to try the same solution to a problem and expect a different result.   yesterday i wondered what a small child's mind was doing while he was exploring the world.  today i wonder what is going on in the human mind the moment one crosses over into area of what i would call insanity,  a time where you cross over into a behavior you know will harm you in the long term, yet in the short term, our brains somehow rationalize whatever that is.   why does someone take drugs?  why does another step over the lines in a marriage for greener pastures, or we go to a doctor that says, "eat better and exercise to help yourself,"  and medicine sales are at an all time high, yet, the quality of life for most is not improving.   instead, more of america is medicating, than living.    others are trying to wrap up and control life in a way where nothing changes,  they are "in control" and yet when something unexpected happens in a world where your life can change in a nano-second - people crumble and wonder "why me?"

augmanity is a technology that will allow people to at least see what the other person thinks and feels.  nikola tesla said one day people's thoughts will be able to be projected out on screens for others to see.   i am not sure if this will be in 100, 200 or 500 years.  what i do know is today with technology, you can get a glimpse at what another is thinking, yet, the refinement will still take another 20 years to get a version that is reliable.  until then,  i fear like my brother this morning, missing a flight because it took 1 1/2 hours to get through security at BWI, the people will pay the price for technology and change.  usually, fear and not love is the reason behind our technology bases.

until then, man really will simply continue to invent new ways to medicate himself in a world that is moving faster, has more information and emotional stimuli constantly bombarding him that adds to normal stress levels.   the bad news is that as we progress, live in closer proximity to each other, and have to share more resources - the stress is just going to get worse.

it brings me to a line an old drug enforcement friend said to me a year ago.   he is done with the war on drugs, "it simply has become a war no one want to win, it is too lucrative for both sides."   while i understand the meaning of that, it was his other line that sent a chill up my spine, "in the 80's people were using drugs as a form of recreation.  today, they are using them to forget."

i do want to understand the dynamic of what is going on the moment a sane person decides to take a shot of heroin for the first time.   everyone knows the outcome will probably not bode well, but still, countless people take that step forward into insanity.

i would like to understand the dynamic of what is going on the moment a sane married person decides to step over the line and think an affair is love

it would be amazing if augmanity could take two people in a relationship that is not working and allow each other to see how they make the other person feel.  or understand what the other feels.  so often both peoples blind spots match where einstein's definition of insanity holds true and people use what i call "habitual" arguing to further wedge any hope of healing into a relationship further apart with the wedge of insanity in thinking they will get a different result by arguing the same way.

some days i think i am insane in trying to take what i have seen or done in the world and try to make it a bit better, but alas, i fear man will repeat history.  all i can do is try to address and heal my issues and pray that others might do the same.

it is ironic, people ask, 'why do you believe in god, mark?"  there are a few people that grasp, "sometimes in life you fall so far that you can't get up anymore, then something helps pick you up that is not you."   then you know something is there that we can't see, yet, goes beyond faith and the belief in the unseen.

the one thing in my control today, is to go to one of my favorite serviced in church the entire year. it is called the healing service.   oddly, i wasn't supposed ot be here, i was already supposed to be in switzerland - yet, in my heart, i am pretty sure i am to help a friend with an idea that will help others.  of course, if you try to explain beyond spreadsheets and logic to most of the world, it will make no sense.  but there is a knowing you follow that makes little sense.  so today, i get to go to a sombre and quiet service in church.  get holy oil slathered on me - maybe it is like an oil change in a car where you need to do maintenance each day, yet a few times a year you need more work.   it is called the healing service.  there will be only very few people there, as most of the world is too busy with obligations, being busy, or medicating the pain away instead of saying, "uhm, god, i have some scars and wounds from walking around on this planet, can you help apply the right medicine to help me heal?"

to much of the world, this approach seems insane.  it simply doesn't work fast enough in our instant gratification society.